people have their sourdough starters (which i reject), and i have my own baking project — recreating momofuku’s take on bing, aka flatbread.
if my recollection of momofuku history is correct, bing made its debut on majordomo’s menu when majordomo opened in january 2018. i could be wrong (i definitely might be wrong), but that’s the first time i remember seeing it at momofuku. the first time i ate it was the month majordomo opened — we got the bing with the chickpea hozon as well as an eggplant dip, and, then, ten months later, we got the bing with the spicy pork neck and pineapple.
bing — or different variations thereof — has since been rolled out at different momofuku restaurants. i believe kojin has a version made with cornmeal, while the bing at CCDC is the same as the one at majordomo. bang bar uses the same bing apparently, though it’s stretched thinner and feels more elastic and springy in texture. they do a rye crepe version at the new bbq place.
i have no idea why the craving hit me so hard a few nights ago, but it did. like i said, i reject sourdough during this pandemic, but i’ve been getting back into baking bread as quarantine stretches longer, and i’ve been worrying a lot about the future of restaurants as i roll around my studio by myself. somehow, all that together led me here.
there’s no recipe for momofuku’s bing out there, but there is a clip of david chang at majordomo talking about bing for ugly delicious. he lists a few of the ingredients, and i’m sure there are a few secret things he doesn’t mention, but it was enough to get started — and so i did.
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how are y’all doing? i’ve been spending too much time on twitter, which has made me realize how much i dislike twitter. it feels so clique-y, this extension of networking that rings so false because there’s no way that everyone actually likes or is friends with everyone, which is something i had confirmed for me firsthand last year. that’s like the shtick with twitter, though, and its warped professionalism, where networking is blended with this faux friendliness, which has the effect of keeping people out and making them feel like shit for not being in the right cliques. i don’t like it. i know i’m not the only person who feels like this.
then again, maybe i don’t like it because i’m not good at playing that social media game, but i’m not interested in that kind of performative bullshit. like, i’m not opposed to networking, but i am opposed to platform that fakes friendliness — it’s just so disingenuous. does that put me at a disadvantage? probably. putting all this down into words is probably stupid and will hurt me in some way in the future — but, then again, being open about living with a suicidal, depressive brain has hurt me and will continue to hurt me in the future, so i guess i’m used to being dumb.
twitter has also made me realize how much i want to be liked by certain people — and how petty i am when i see them responding to other people but not to me. yup. maybe i just don’t like twitter because it reflects the negative parts of my self at me. idk what the point of this section was. i’m on twitter a lot these days.
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bing is pretty simple — it’s water, sugar, yeast, flour, salt. the tricky part is getting the ratios right.
the first time i make it, i leave the dough to rise overnight, sitting on my chair by my window because it’s chilly. it’s risen beautifully by the morning, and i punch it down, cut it into (uneven) portions, and roll them into rounds. after they’ve rested for 30-ish minutes, i heat a pan and roll each round into a flat, thin-ish circle. they’re cooked in butter, and they become fluffy bing with a nice chew, reminiscent of the bing at majordomo. i think it needs more sugar, more salt, but, in general, i’m happy, especially with this being a first attempt of a recipe i made up.
i get a tip to add olive oil to my dough, so, the second time i make it, i up the salt and sugar and add olive oil. i haven’t really worked with oils in dough, though, so i’m unsure how much oil to add, how much water to reduce. i could google this, but i wing it instead.
this second batch takes longer to come together and isn’t as smooth as i’d like. i also use a different combination of flour — my first batch was all bread flour, this second is 2:1 apf to bread — and i think i get the oil to water ratio all wrong. it’s bread, though, and bread can be fairly forgiving, so i add more water as needed, a little more flour, until i end up with an elastic but kinda craggy ball of dough.
i leave it to rise for a few hours, then go through the same steps of portioning, making rounds, resting, rolling out, and cooking on a hot pan with butter. this batch isn’t as fluffy, but the flavor is improved. the thing, though, is that it feels less like bing and more like pita with larger air pockets, so it needs more work. still. it’s really damn good.
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other things i’ve been making — pasta, lots of pasta, and fucking tapioca balls because i am so desperate for boba. (both my attempts at tapioca balls have failed miserably. i’ll make another attempt next week.) i’ve also been playing with bulgogi marinade, learned how to make miljeonbyeong for jeolpan, and baked asian milk bread because toast is another staple of my diet and i can’t get to paris baguette — or, well, i can, but that’s a six-mile round trip walking because i’m avoiding subways and, even, car services as much as i can.
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i’ve found myself saying that i miss things a lot, like i miss the korean market, i miss boba, i miss sushi. i miss restaurants. it feels weird to say any of that because i feel like i’m steeping in privilege — i am safe, ensconced away in my studio, and i am healthy. i am not employed and am unsure when my final invoices will be paid, but i am not going hungry (yet). if it takes me months to find new work, i have the last-ditch financial safety net of family.
when my family calls, they ask, concerned, how things are in new york, but the truth is i live in a residential neighborhood in brooklyn, and, when i look out the window or go downstairs to throw out my trash or walk to my local market, life looks the same. my neighborhood is quiet, but it’s always been quiet. there are sirens occasionally, but no more than before — at least, i don’t think so.
things just feel different because i’m home all the time, because i spend more time every day reading the news and looking up cuomo’s daily briefings then i should. the crisis is real because i know friends who have been sick, who have lost loved ones, who are afraid for the health of loved ones. i live with the very real terror that my parents will get sick, that, for whatever reason, i will not be able to get to them in los angeles. i wish my crush would post on social media every so often as a kind of i’m alive, tbanks check-in, and i think i’m not the only one who thinks this about people we know but don’t, as silly as it sounds, because we’re anxious and afraid, and this virus could take anyone.
one thing that makes this crisis so unbearable is knowing that we are not exiting into what we considered normal. we are all going to exit into an altered world that is full of holes where beating hearts once were, and we are all going to carry loss and heartbreak and sorrow.
we are all going to carry grief.
and the thing is — we should not be picking up the threads of life as it once was and trying to go back to “normal.” if this crisis has done one useful thing, it’s flaying open how our systems were built to benefit the white and wealthy and to kill BIPOC, the marginalized, the disenfranchised. our healthcare system is one that prioritizes the profits of insurance companies and big pharma, even in the midst of a pandemic that is going to kill hundreds of thousands of americans, while our government would rather put money back into the pockets of executives at giant corporations and banks than the people who staff the restaurant industry, small businesses, and independent operations. ours is a country that not only tolerates racism but also encourages it and looks the other way when people of color are assaulted and murdered because of the color of their skin.
every time someone tries to claim that our system is broken, i want to scream, no, it’s not. our country is functioning exactly the way it was meant to, and, if you’re just coming to realize how fucked up this country is, i almost envy you your privilege.
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i also made dalgona coffee, which has been everywhere. if you don’t know, dalgona coffee is this frothy, whipped coffee drink that went viral amongst koreans earlier this year. it’s 2 tablespoons instant coffee, 2 tablespoons sugar, and 2 tablespoons boiled water.
combine everything in a glass or bowl or vessel of your choice, and whisk 400 times (or cheat and use an electric mixer). you’ll wonder what the hell you’re doing for the first 200 whisks or so, but, once you hit the halfway point, you’ll notice the mixture start to lighten and change. when it starts forming soft peaks, pour the combo over milk and ice.
some people like it with hot milk, and i’ve tried pouring it over cold brew to get more of that coffee flavor, but, in the end, i’m in the minority here — i don’t like dalgona. it’s too sweet, and instant coffee is too acidic, and it just leaves me feeling nauseated.
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i still miss boba and sushi. i miss restaurants. i miss hugging people, and i miss physical contact. i miss my parents and my dogs — omfg, i miss my dogs. i miss kawi. i miss being able to duck into the korean market when my brain is feeling heavy, roaming the aisles and picking up random things and leaving with more snacks than i really need. i miss the milk bread at paris baguette, slathering it with peanut butter and maybe some jelly if i’m in the mood. i miss boba; did i say that already? I MISS HUGS. i miss sharing meals and not having to do dishes multiple times a day. i miss not being so hyper-afraid every time i leave my apartment just to go to the grocery store.
i miss a lot of things. i’m sure you do, too.
over the weekend, i order a food scale so i can get really precise about this bing. it’s not like i have much else to do, so i may as well try to get this recipe perfect.
I came here looking for a recipe for bing bread (a la Majordomo), but really enjoyed the entire post! I really appreciate your honesty about your feelings during this pandemic but also the frank discussion about how we SHOULD NOT go back to normal because normal wasn't working, especially for BIPOC.